I don’t remember where I read about this, but it’s a
brilliant idea. It’s saved me lot of worry, several anxiety pills, and probably
an ulcer.
All writers seem to have a pervasive sense of overwhelming,
ill-defined anxiety. At times it verges on panic and even despair. We’re
universally puzzled as to why we’re doing this. We often say because it makes
us happy. And it does. It keeps us sane and gives us moments of elation and
joy. But those are only moments. The rest of the time, we’re worried.
We worry that we can’t write a book. We worry that we can’t
finish it. We worry that we’ve done a horrible job. We’re worried we won’t ever
get published. When we’re published we worry that our books won’t sell, that we’ll
get horrible reviews, that the world will discover what shams we are. Then we
worry that we’ll never be able to write another book. After that, the wonderful
merry-go-round starts again!
I found a great help for all of this! The Worry List. I
typed up a list of everything I was worried about. I included deadlines and
sales, forgetting blogs, but also, since my first list was in the fall,
Christmas presents and birthday presents. (Our family, me included, tends to
have children during the fall and during winter holidays.) I also added some
personal health, family, and money-related things. They totaled to 21.
Then, with all my worries solidified, defined, and recorded,
I closed the file and went about my way, worrying only about the specific
project I was working on at the time. Whenever I began to feel anxious, I would
open the file and there would be all my worries, still safe and sound.
Some people advocate setting aside a regular period of time
to spend worrying about the list items, but I found I only needed to check on
them and give them a moment, as needed.
Two months after I made the list, I went over each item and
discovered that I could remove 3 of them. Just lately, I removed 5 more. They
are still “things” but they are things that I’m not going to worry about anymore (except the birthday and Christmas gifts—those will be added back).
There are still 13 items on the list, so it is alive and well. I imagine I’ll
add to it someday, but haven’t had to yet.
Why does looking at my Worry List make me feel secure? Doesn’t
everyone know that writers are different? What can I say?
11 comments:
Kaye, I like your system! Of course, if I wrote a worry list for myself, it would have about 317 items on it. ;-) But maybe worth a try!
Sometimes you can combine them. For instance, I worry about all my kids and grandkids collectively as one item.
Thanks for stopping by!
A great idea, Kaye. I think if I wrote a list I would find months later that most of the things I worry about never come to pass. And I agree that we writers are a different breed.
Yes, Jean, that's what happens. It makes me pause when I start to add something. A lot of things I worry about are NOT worth the trouble.
Sounds like a good plan. I'll have to try it!
This might work best if you're a natural born list maker, like me. Hope it helps, Morgan!
I worry. I make lists. I check on those lists. I think this method of easing that worry by making a worry list might work for me, but then I worry it won't.
I will give it a try, Kaye. I don't have much to lose.
You know, if one more list is one more thing to worry about, that would NOT be good! Hope that doesn't turn out to be the case for anyone trying this.
Frankly, I don't worry that much. As I often remind myself, I'm too blessed to be stressed.
I love it! What a great idea, filing it away and taking a gander now and then. I've done this only when I can't sleep at night. I make up the list and leave on my desk or nightstand, hoping that having all the free-floating thoughts in black and white will get me through a sleep-filled night, and it does! But I hadn't thought of keeping the list, which will prove that most of my worries (and everyone else's) are pointless. Thanks for a great post.
I'm thrilled this will help you, Denise!
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