by Janis Patterson
The hardest thing about blogging regularly is coming up with
an idea for a post. After the basic premise is secure, writing the post is a
breeze – and usually takes no more than half the time. But coming up with that
idea…
I’ve blogged about technique until I feel I should hand the
most faithful of my readers a degree of some sort and about my personal life
until, being a very private person, I feel half naked. Besides, I really don’t
think that people are or even should be interested in the cute things my
animals do or the new curtains I’m putting in the guest room, what I’m cooking
for supper that night or my political/religious beliefs. While such things
affect my writing, they should not affect my books, and my books are the
connection with readers – not my supper plans or curtain colors.
I truly do not understand the need some readers feel to know
the minutiae of a writer’s personal life. While I admit to a vague curiosity
about if my favorites are married, and in what part of the country they live,
and the most general of information, none of it is necessary to my enjoyment of
their books – or really any of my business. Their books are the connection
between us – not the color of their drapes or dinner plans, to continue my
rather tired example.
I find, though, that I am in the minority. Far too many
readers today feel entitled to know the daily details of a writer’s life, as if
they were next door neighbors or long time friends and the only reason they
aren’t welcome to come over every morning for coffee is distance. As writers we
are encouraged if not demanded to befriend our readers, interact with them,
share with them and no one ever seems to realize that the more time we spend
befriending and interacting and sharing with them is time we are not spending
writing the next book. Ah, but, says the entitled reader, that’s for everyone
else – not for them.
So is it the books they like, or being ‘intimate’ with a
writer? I’m afraid it’s what we in the talent industry (I used to work in an
actors’ agency) the ‘stardust factor’ – the belief that by being close to
someone even semi-famous some of their fame and glamour sprinkles down on them.
(I can hear all you writers chortling at the concept of writing being
glamorous!) Of course, this doesn’t apply to everyone – I have made several
dear friends who began as fans, but in every case it is an organic relationship
that grew naturally and not something deliberately sought.
Maybe my insistence on a certain level of privacy and
distaste of feigning a relationship that doesn’t really exist is why I’m not as
popular as I think I should be. Or perhaps it’s just that I was raised with the
belief that putting oneself forward constantly saying “look at me look at me” is
vulgar. Either way, so be it. If my animals and curtain colors and dinner plans
are more important to readers than my books I pity them.
8 comments:
I'm on Facebook a lot, since it's recommended not to push my writing, but to try to engage with people instead. I really don't know if that helps or not, but at least I've made some friends. I share stuff, but it depends how much other people should really know. Sometimes, you have to draw the line.
I used to do a blog quite a bit. I've since found that if I use up the time to be blogging, or on facebook, I can't do the other things I love. Writing takes time a quiet room, and you can't write with distractions--at least I can't! I agree with the idea that putting oneself out there constantly is not only vulgar, it's annoying to others. I've found that those who tend to do that soon are no where to be seen later on. Maybe they tapped their fingers to the bone (or they really weren't that devoted to writing in the first place)?
I agree wholeheartedly with your post. It's very hard for anyone who was raised to be courteous and let others take the limelight to become more forward. I marvel at how easily some writers can create a public persona that talks about their home life in great detail. When I do introduce something mildly personal, such as a post I'm writing now about my grandfather's photography, it's because it relates directly to a story I'm working on. Otherwise, I don't think it belongs in my professional life. I've noticed that the most successful writers are careful about what they put out on social media. Thanks for writing and sharing this.
Your post echoes many of my feelings. I can't imagine why anyone would be interested in my everyday life. Now, if I take a special trip or get involved with a special activity, I probably would write about that, but curtains? (Mine need a good cleaning,) Cooking? (I tend to burn things and my smoke alarm is always going off.) I decided to blog about writing, but I'm reaching a point where I don't know what to write next. I'm afraid I'm starting to repeat myself. It's nice to know you also search for new ideas.
I have to agree with what you've said here. I love connecting with other people, especially readers. However, I don't feel comfortable giving personal details of my private life to complete strangers. I will mention my writing and blogs on social media but not discuss my family, etc. It just doesn't seem appropriate for me.
I am a recently retired PI as well as a mystery author, and readers might find it interesting to know that while I was active in "the biz," I had several online identities that I regularly used to spy on subjects and get useful information out of them. Needless to say, I'm a bit paranoid about what I reveal online. http://pamelabeason.com
I admit I've been turned off by some authors who continually express strong political beliefs. Of course they have the right to express themselves, but they should realize not everyone agrees with their ideology and for them to continually berate the opposite site will alienate some readers. If I like an author's works, I don't need to know how she voted.
While I also agree with what you said, I think the pendulum continues to swing the other way.
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